Foxy Roxy Smile!

So how did I do?

2009-04-13T02:16:00.002-04:00

Well I didn't do great. Didn't eat breakfast, didn't take my vitamins, didn't drink all of my water.

During Easter dinner I did pretty well, but when I got home and took a look at the cheese board I couldn't help myself. So I totaled 2436 calories, which is right about maintenance for me.

But I was super happy that I got a good picture of Aaron and myself!

Easter Dinner

2009-04-12T11:48:00.003-04:00

I'm going to set some goals for today:

-I'm going to have a healthy filling breakfast
-I'm going to take my vitamins with breakfast
-I'm going to drink a great deal of water today
-At the dinner table I'm going to fill up on veggies and salad first, then move on to the delicious Puerto Rican high fat foods
-And I'm going to celebrate my 1.5 pound loss for this week!

Anyway, I've got a busy day ahead of me, including two videos to film! Have a great holiday/weekend!

Week 2

2009-04-06T01:11:00.003-04:00

My WI today showed a 1.5 gain, but I'm not bummed. I did alright this week, and well enough to have seen a loss. I'll just let my body do its thing, and as long as I'm making the right choices I have nothing to worry about.

I'm thinking about doing Couch 2 5K. Its a program where you gradually learn to run 5k or 30 minutes. But I'm finding that jogging outside is hard on my knees, so I think I'm going to setup the treadmill in the basement. I would have worked out tonight if it actually was setup. I'll post more when I know more on C25K.

As for other things going on in my life, I've decided to become an Independent Beauty Consultant with Mary Kay Cosmetics. Starting a home run business is ideal for me right now because I might be starting school full time and I won't be able to hold down a full time job. I'm on my way to getting started selling. Just tying up loose ends and waiting to receive my starter kit. If any of you is interested in purchasing from me, I'd be happy to oblige. But more on that later on when I'm established. I've got a busy week coming up so I need to stay on track with my eating and exercise even when things get stressful. Tomorrow is my free day so I need to clean this place up and look over the MK (Mary Kay) manual.

I know this will be a great week!

Week 1

2009-03-30T23:29:00.003-04:00

My end of week 1 weigh in on Sunday was good, but I still felt a bit disappointed. I was down to 233 from my 234.5 starting weight. And yes, a 1.5 pound loss is pretty much on target for my goals. But I guess I was feeling pretty bad about how slow my progress has to be. I know that its healthy to lose 1-2 pounds per week. But I have 108 pounds to lose! And if I was dedicated enough (and if my body permitted me) to lose 2 pounds per week, then it would take me 54 weeks. That is nearly a year! And I would be at my goal weight sometime in March of 2010! And yes, I know that I did not put this weight on overnight, and that its not going to come off overnight. I just wish I could lose weight "Biggest Loser" style. If I could drop, lets say 5 pounds a week, then by the end of the summer I would be at my goal weight. Totally laughable I know! Its hard for me believe that "slow and steady wins the race".

In my life I have learned that expectations usually yield disappointments. So, I don't want to hope for 2 pounds every week and feel bad if I don't lose that much. I want to have the approach where I'm making healthy changes for myself, and even if the scale doesn't directly reflect it, I know I'm doing something totally good for myself. I've been going for walks this past week. Even if I don't want to go, I push myself to go because I know that this will help me not only to see a smaller number on the scale, but to also feel better. I love going on the walks because I get to see such beautiful things, trees, birds, flowers (they're finally starting to bloom!) and people. I also love the smell of the breeze, and its been fairly windy since its March. When I really don't want to get out of bed Aaron (my bf) encourages me, and that really helps! Sometimes he helps me get dressed (sneakers, hoodie) when I'm feeling particularly rebellious. But I notice that during my walks I'm glad that I got out of the house, and I just love the buzzing in my body when I'm actually using it. I need to push myself a little more, going on leisurely walks all the time isn't going to help me build muscle. I have to do some brisk walking and a bit more work with my resistance bands. My bf wants to get us a bowflex. :D

As for my eating, well I've been keeping track of my calories on MyFoodDiary. And I've been doing pretty well. Just this past week alone I've eaten out and ordered in too much. I gotta get back to making the weekly plan of dinner for each night. I like it because I know what I'm making for dinner and I can prepare ahead of time (like defrosting meats, etc). Sushi has been a real weak spot for me lately. I think we went out to eat sushi twice this weekend alone! I just can't get enough. Tonight I planned out all of my food for tomorrow on MFD (MyFoodDiary) and it totaled about 1300 calories, which is totally okay because I'm getting up early tomorrow to go to the park with Aaron before he goes out to take care of some things. He likes to play handball, and I like to walk the track, so we do a bit of both. I'm going to aim for about 500 calories burned, and my heart rate monitor is perfect for giving me an accurate reading (I love my Polar F11!). Oh! And one thing I really love about MFD is that the forums are awesome. There is so much support, and so many groups to join. I'm part of one for ladies who want to lose 100+ pounds, and its really nice to check in with them every day. I tell them how my day is going, what I need to work on, what I did well, and basically they cheer me on. Its real good stuff. :D

So, I've decided that I need to update this blog more often, not so much for other people, because honestly I don't think anyone reads it, but for myself. I want to document my journey through multiple means. I've been wanting to make a new video for my weight loss YouTube, but I've been so wrapped up in other things. And I've been neglecting my makeup channel as well. So I think I'll get those things done while Aaron is out. And I've got a massive amount of laundry to do as well! So I'll be a busy girl tomorrow.

Ambitions

2009-03-24T08:33:00.003-04:00

When you were a small child did you have dreams of being something exciting in the future? I changed my mind often going from a teacher, to a forensic scientist, to a writer, to a psychologist, to a world class chef, and I'm sure a few more in between. As I finished up high school I knew I wanted a job I would love to wake up for everyday, I knew that I wanted a happy future. But since then all it has been is confusion. I decided to go to culinary school after deciding that being a forensic scientist was too morbid, being a writer was too unstable (in terms of money), being a psychologist would require too many years of school, and my mom didn't want me to become a teacher.

So away I went to culinary school and completed 2 years, during which I went all the way to Florida for 4 months to complete my externship. It was difficult yet fun, and I loved being away from home. I made some great friends, and met/started dating Aaron there (June will be 2 years that we're together, and 1.5 years of living together). Once we graduated Aaron and I went to Florida where we both worked for my old externship place together. My job the second time around was very stressful and exhausting. Every morning I felt that dreaded feeling in my gut, and all day I felt anxious. And after I would get home my day would seem to end too soon. I only was able to do it for 2 months. We came back to the north where I moved in with Aaron at his parent's house in New Jersey. Aaron's mom had the mindset that we should take as much time as we wanted to figure stuff out. I felt scarred from my last culinary job, and had decided that maybe I liked cooking at home much better. And so this rut began.

I began thoroughly thinking about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I thought about writing, and teaching. But, I didn't want to go back to school just yet, I had just graduated from culinary school and thought I deserved a little break. We waited around a couple of months to clear our heads and then we started looking for jobs. Aaron's parent's were providing us with shelter and a weekly allowance of money for our own grocery shopping. Jersey was beautiful, spring had just bloomed into summer and life seemed perfect. Finding a job proved to be quite difficult, but we weren't worried, Aaron's mother assured us that we had time. Aaron and his family were to take a trip to Utah for 2 weeks while I stayed behind to house sit and take care of the cat. Those two weeks alone in that house was interesting to say the least. I had to take care of the flower and vegetable gardens every day. And I needed to feed the cat. Not to mention I had my own little kitty to feed, Bailey. I spent most of the two weeks taking care of my responsibilities, watching tv, going to Barnes & Noble, and reading the "Twilight" books. When Aaron came home, I felt like I didn't know him anymore. He had been reading about meditation before his trip, but it seems that during his time away he had made a breakthrough, and had transformed a bit. He no longer carried other people's burdens. He was determined to become enlightened. He no longer cared about the petty worries that weighed us down. It was hard for me to accept this new Aaron, but I did. He was more loving at times, and much colder at times. It was as if his intensity had been ignited ablaze, but in another sense he had been extinguished. It was a difficult time for the both of us, but we pulled through, and we're still going strong. In our desperation to find a job that would actually pay us well, we signed up for bartending classes. The whole fee was $400, and included certification and lifetime job placement. The classes were fun, and we completed them in a few weeks. We passed the final test which boosted our confidence levels. Once we were certified we began looking to get placed. The jobs that they offered us would not hire us because we didn't have experience. Long story short, we couldn't get hired. The certification place had told us that we would make between $300 and $800 a night, and that in nearly 1 night we would make back to the fee for the classes. To this day those $400 are still on my credit card, obviously I was never able to pay it off.

Since those days of trying to be a bartender, I've tried to get jobs as a babysitter, a receptionist, a cashier, a cook, and various other things. Aaron and I moved in with my mom, things with Aaron's mom had turned quite sour, and my mom was feeling quite lonely when her boyfriend would be gone for weeks at a time. Shortly after moving back home I landed a job at a steakhouse that I used to work at. I trained and finally became a server. I worked nights, didn't make much money, and felt totally drained at the end of each shift. Then they decided to move me up by having me close several nights a week. This was a bad move. Basically I had to make sure everyone had done their job at the end of the night, and if they hadn't and I signed then out, I would have to do it myself. Some of the people I worked with did half-assed jobs, and I would have to stay late. I wasn't even making good money! After 2 months, I quit. I couldn't do it anymore, it just wasn't worth it for me. In my desperation to land another job quickly, I set up an interview with a company that made a "Whos Who", and I was a telemarketer calling people, harassing them, trying to trick them, trying to convince them to hand over their money. Needless to say, rejection after rejection really does put a damper on your mood. I was working on commission and couldn't sell anything, and after 2 unpaid days of training, and only 3 days on the sales floor, I quit, taking home only $100. My last few jobs were totally traumatic for me, and I think I can officially say that I'm in a rut.

Ever since Aaron started this enlightenment quest he's been in the mindset that ambition and success is a bad thing, because the only thing that comes from it is failure and misery. And I have to say that I totally agree. I wish I could just live my life as if floating on a river going whichever way I'm taken. But, the reality is that I need a job, because we need money. This are hard times and finding a job these days is nearly impossible. Aaron landed a security job at the airport, but that was after shelling out over $1000 and taking classes. I feel like I'm not ambitious enough to go back to school. Aaron and I dream about how great it would be to become teachers. Work Monday-Friday, only 6.5 hours a day, weekends and nights off, vacations throughout the year, and don't forget paid summer vacation! The pay is good, the benefits are even better. And if we were both teachers we could really live comfortably! But, every time it comes down to the fact that right now we don't want to sacrifice 6 years of our lives to go to school again, plus we can't even afford school right now. The house we live in might we going under foreclosure. And things are just all around crazy right now. I just want to be a stay at home... Roxy? I'm no mom yet! And maybe write novels to supplement Aaron's income.

The reason all of this is in my head is that this morning I woke up from a dream where I went back to school and it was too difficult. I felt too rusty, and all I could do was cry about it. In reality, I know that deep down there is that fear that I've been out of the loop for too long. That my vocabulary has deteriorated. And I doubt myself, I doubt that I could ever be a writer, I doubt that I could ever get through school without being miserable. Ever since I was 14 all I wanted to do was to escape misery. My teenage years were a big miserable mess, and now that I'm living at home again I can see why. All I know is that my 15 year old self wouldn't recognize this 21 year old Roxy. And I have to wonder what type of impact Aaron had on me. My mom says that he has changed me in a bad way, and I have to think of if objectively. I'm less ambitious, I'm more care-free, I'm quite a bit happier, and I'm okay with just living for today. Though there is a voice in the back of my head that screams for me to do something, anything, get a job, go back to school, just stop doing nothing. But, honestly, I enjoy sleeping in everyday, and I enjoy cooking dinner every night. And now that I'm taking walks, I enjoy having the time and energy to take care of myself.

I do have a slightly ambitious side of me that has created a few possibilities:
-Go back to college and either become a writer or teacher
-Go to MUD and become a makeup artist
-Get a loan and start my own Mineral Makeup Line
-Get myself published and write a series

I just feel that Aaron and I have become conjoined twins, and that I wouldn't be able to trudge through the shit of becoming a teacher if Aaron where not there next to me trudging through it himself. It just doesn't seem worth it to me. Anyway, I have a lot to think about in the near future, but at least I was able to get this off my chest.

~~~~~
So far the eating right and exercise are going well!

New Beginings

2009-03-22T04:03:00.003-04:00

I've decided that this will no longer be a makeup blog. Since I've originally created this blog for weight loss purposes I will be reinstating it as a weight loss blog with other topics related to my daily life.

I joined MyFoodDiary.com again. Last year I used it with much success: I lost about 15 pounds in 2 months. Its a website that helps you keep track of your calories and exercises so you can ensure that you're expending more than you take in. Its simple and very easy to use. The forums are a great source of motivation as well. I'm glad to be back and I know that its well worth the $9 monthly membership fee. I look forward to shedding these pounds.

My Statst: 5'1'' with Medium Body Frame
My Official Start Weight: 234.5 pounds
My Goal Weight: 125 pounds
Weight Left to Lose: 109.5 pounds
My Official Starting Body Fat: %

My goal is to lose 2 pounds per week by staying in the net calorie range of 1200 calories. Net calories= calories consumed - calories burned through exercise. I hope to get exercise in most days of the week and I'm looking to burn between 600-800 calories. I want to center my eating around fruits, veggies, whole grains, lean meats, good fats and low fat dairy. I feel that this would be the best way to eat while losing weight because I obviously want to become healthier as I become thinner. I'll be making a video to post on my FoxyRoxySmile YouTube Channel. Aside from that, I'll update when I have some news.

Sexy Blues Makeup Tutorial

2009-03-06T03:35:00.002-05:00

So about a month or two ago I got the "Get Loaded" collection from Spell Cosmetics. Its basically seven colors all each one color from the rainbow (red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet). I wanted to create a look using those pretty blues and here's what I came up with.

Check out the video here.

Products Used:

Eyes:
Too Faced Shadow Insurance
NYX Jumbo Eyeshadow Pencil in "Pots & Pans"
Spell Cosmetics Mineral Eyeshadow in "Sublime"
Spell Cosmetics Mineral Eyeshadow in "Confession"
Bare Escentuals Eyeshadow in "Blush"
Spell Cosmetics Mineral Eyeshadow in "Silver"
Cover Girl Perfect Point Plus Eye Pencil in "Black Onyx"
Coastal Scents Gel Liner in "Indigo"
Coastal Scents Gel Liner in "True Black"
CoverGirl Lash Blast Luxe in "Black Platinum"

Cheeks:
Jessie's Girl Color My World Eyeshadow in "Volcanic"

Lips:
Spell Cosmetics Obvious By Spell Lip Gloss in "Rae"

I hope you guys enjoyed the look!

Experiment: Best Way To Remove Gel Liners?

2009-02-21T12:25:00.008-05:00

I always had a problem at the end of the night trying to remove the gel liner off of my eye without:
a. ripping my eyelids off
b. looking like a racoon when I wake up in the morning
c. using something super expensive

So I decided to experiment with a few different methods of removing gel liners efficiently. You can check out the video of the experiment here.

First I primed my hand with Too Faced Shadow Insurance and used Coastal Scents Gel Liner in "True Black" to draw three thick lines on the back of my hand.

I put each item on a cotton ball and ran it back and forth over each line.
Here are the results:
-Caudalie Cleansing Water took 30 back and forth motions to get to that point in the picture.
-Neutrogena Oil Free Makeup Remover took 20 back and forth motions.
-Extra Virgin Olive Oil took 14 back and forth motions.

16 Fl Oz $8-$10 in supermarkets
So as you can see for yourself the Extra Virgin Olive Oil worked the best. And its non-comedogenic, which means for most people it won't clog pores. It would be best to test a small area on your face to make sure its compatible with your skin before using it to remove your makeup. And I recommend that after using the olive oil to wash your face with a cleanser, I recommend Dove Deep Moisture Creamy Facial Cleanser. I have acne but this cleanser makes my face feel super clean(removes all traces of makeup), soft and nongreasy. I got it as a gift and I've been hooked ever since!

5.5 FL OZ $7-$8 at drugstores
The Neutogena Oil Free Makeup Remover claims to have a nongreasy feel but it totally does. And although it does a fairly nice job at removing the gel liner I feel that it has a greasy feel comprable to that of the Extra Virgin Olive Oil and its more expensive, so I don't think I'll be buying it again.

6.7 FlOz. $23 at Sephora
And the Caudalie Cleansing Water, well, I love this product for removal of foundation and for quick clean ups when I make a mistake putting on my eye makeup. It smells really nice, like grapeseeds, and it leaves my skin feeling clean. It is a bit pricy, but I really like it, so I'll keep it it around (I've been using this product for about two years).

30 count $4.29 at Walgreens
In the video I tested some Makeup Removal Cloths from Walgreens. Super inexpensive, and they work wonders on removing my foundation. They are also pretty good at removing eye makeup, so these would be another option for removing gel liners. Plus, I can be a lazy girl and just pull one of these babies out instead of going through the whole thing of getting cotton balls and cleansers. I will definitely repurchase these when I run out.

Good luck finding the right one that works for you!

Valentine's Day

2009-02-16T12:31:00.005-05:00

I hope you guys had a wonderful Valentine's Day! Aaron and I went to a little Thai place with my cousin and her boyfriend. Then we went to see "Friday The 13th". It was a fun night, and the food was fantastic. Here's a picture of us at the restaurant, I wish Aaron would have smiled!

Here is a closeup of the makeup:

Valentine's Day Smoky Burgundy

2009-02-12T17:58:00.008-05:00

I had a request from Janet2Hot on YouTube to do a smoky burgundy tutorial. And I thought that it would be perfect for a night out on Valentine's Day. If you haven't seen the tutorial on YouTube, check it out here. I hope you guys like it!

Here's the look:

Products Used:

Eyes:
Too Faced Shadow Insurance
Coastal Scents 88 Color Shimmer Palette
*B5- Golden Bronze
*I8- Deep Red
*K7- Deep Plum
*H3- Pinky Purple
*K8- Black
*A6- Golden Beige

L'Oreal Paris Lineur Intense in "Carbon Black"
Cover Girl Perfect Point Plus Eye Pencil in "Black Onyx"
Maybelline Lash Stiletto Mascara in "Very Black"
Ardell's #116 False Lashes applied with Duo Adhesive

Cheeks:
Maybelline Expert Wear Blush in "Precious Pink"

Lips:
Sally Hanson Lipnotic Gem Gloss in "Embellished"

And here are the nails I put on myself. They're Broadway Real Life nails. Aren't they gorgeous?

Heartbreaker Cosmetics Contest!

2009-01-31T22:37:00.006-05:00

I did this look for the Heartbreaker Cosmetics Contest. First place gets 1 full sized shadow and 5 samples all of the winner's choice. And second and third each get 2 free samples. :D

The theme for the look was the colors on the Heartbreaker Cosmetics' logo: White, Pink, Red & Black.

I did a tutorial on Youtube for it, go check it out here!
I hope you guys like it! I hope I win!

Update:
I won 3rd place! I'm so excited to get my samples! I haven't tried HeartBreaker Cosmetics yet! :D

The Seasons

2009-01-31T12:26:00.003-05:00

So, Marlena from Makeupgeek.com is having a look of the week prize this week. And what you have to do is submit a look that you've done based on your favorite season. Here was my Spring submission,I was inspired by my favorite fake flower pot:

Lets hope I win! :D

Being a Busy Bee... or not

2009-01-29T20:53:00.003-05:00

I've been catching up on some things I've needed to do. I've filmed quite a few videos for my YouTube channels. And, I'm going to film a makeup tutorial tonight. :D

But other than that I've been totally lazy. I swear, these days all I can do is lay in bed. No exercise, no cleaning, minimal job searching, at least 12 hours of sleep and a good 4-5 hours of television time. I'm doing quite a bit of thinking these days. I've been noticing that my energy is down, my motivation is nonexistent, I'm feeling quite sad. And I'm starting to wonder, what is wrong with me? Five years ago I'd say that I was experiencing a bout of depression. But these days I'm less eager to blame my feelings on depression.

I few days ago I had a really bad night. I had gotten into an argument with my boyfriend about something stupid. And I felt so lost, and alone. I kept thinking back on my crappy childhood, and it just sent me spinning deeper in my misery. This is, of course, affecting my weight loss efforts. And it has also kept me away from making more videos. When you never get out of bed there is no desire to make yourself up and show it to the world, you know? So, I'm trying to get back to doing some of the things I enjoy instead of rotting my brain in front of the t.v.

I've also been having this urge to write. Deep down there is a part of me that wishes I could be a writer. I've been dying to write a novel for years now. I always start one, but never follow through. Bleh, I feel so scattered! I'm gonna get going on that makeup tutorial.

Exercising

2009-01-21T01:51:00.003-05:00

I've posted a video on how my first week doing Paul Mckenna went. And the main thing that I struggled with was exercise. I only worked out once last week. Today I did The Firm workout and my heart rate monitor clocked me at 451 calories burned in 42 minutes. I used 3 pound weights during the video, and I thought it would up my calories burned count, but I did feel my muscles burning. Right after the workout I watched The Biggest Loser. Awesome show. Love it!
Just a quick update after a long, long week.
If I could look as cute as the girl in the picture while working out I'd jump for joy.

:D

Vitamins!

2009-01-13T17:03:00.002-05:00

In my recent video on FoxyRoxySmile ("My Rewards Points System") I spoke about my daily vitamins. So I here is a list of what I take:

~One A Day Weight Smart Advanced (1 tablet)
This daily multivitamin has as much caffeine as a cup of coffee, which isn't so bad, but sometimes I want to take it with dinner and I worry that it will keep me up. I'm debating if when I run out I'm should to change to a woman's daily supplement.

~Flaxseed Oil 1000 mg (1 softgel)
It contains essential fatty acids, like Omega-3, 6 &9 that help support cardiovascular health.

~Astavita Virgin Salmon Oil with AstaREAL Astaxanthin (2 softgels)
This contains essential fatty acids that helps support cardiovascular health with Omega-3s. Astaxanthin is a phytochemical that is a very powerful antioxidant. "Research shows that due to astaxanthin's potent antioxidant activity, it may be beneficial in cardiovascular, immune, inflammatory and neurodegenerative diseases. Research supports the assumption that it protects body tissues from oxidative damage. It also crosses the blood-brain barrier, which makes it available to the eye, brain and central nervous system to alleviate oxidative stress that contributes to ocular, and neurodegenerative diseases such as glaucoma and Alzheimer's."-Wikipedia.com. Check out this website! http://www.astavita.com/perricone.html

~Vitamin C 500 mg (1 tablet)
Its an antioxidant that helps boost immune system.

~Vitamin E 400 I.U. (1 softgel)
Its an antioxidant that helps maintain a healthy heart.

~High Absorbtion Calcium with Vitamin D, Magnesium and Pytonutrients by Nature Made (2 tablets)
Calcium helps decrease risk of osteoporosis in young women.

~Biotin 100 mcg (1 tablet)
Its an essential B vitamin that supports healthy hair and nails.

~Acidophilus Pearls Probiotic by Enzymatic Therapy (1 pearl)
This is a blend of active good bacteria that supports digestive, immune and skin health and helps eliminate free radicals and toxins.

I think this is a good balance of supplements and I'm aiming on taking them every day! I have so much trouble remembering! And recently I've been trying to break it up throughout the day. Instead of taking all 10 at once, I try to take 5 with lunch, and 5 with dinner that way I don't get crazy "fishy burps" from the salmon oil, even though they're lemon flavored (all fish oil will give it to you sometimes). Its gross, haha.

Official Start Weight

2009-01-11T17:09:00.001-05:00

I was pleasantly surprised when the scale read 232.6.

I was 234 a few days ago, so it looks like I'm headed in the right direction.

I even got a workout in today in which I burned 450 calories!

So far so good! :D

Tomorrow is Day 1

2009-01-11T03:02:00.002-05:00

So, I've been procrastinating for the past few days. I keep saying I'm going to start eating better, eating less, drinking more water, exercising, blah, blah, blah. I'm proud to say that I did workout yesterday. I did a 20 minute latin dance dvd. It kicked my butt. Somehow my shoulders and arms are sore, but not my legs or abs. Go figure.

Tomorrow I will start making the change to a healthier life. I don't want to give too much away because I plan on making a video about my plan. But all in all, I'll be eating Paul McKenna style and working out more regularly.

On the makeup front I've posted two videos in the past couple of days, and I'm still 4 videos behind, incredible! I'm going to do quite a bit of filming tomorrow, so expect some new videos soon!

When I wake up in the morning I'll jump on the scale and post my starting weight.

I'm sleepy. Off to bed.

A New Year, A Fresh Start

2009-01-06T02:01:00.000-05:00

So, I've been completely off track. I weighed myself and the scale read 234. I honestly cannot believe how much I've gained in just the past few years. And, of course, I'm sad that since I've gotten off of Jenny Craig, I've gained at least 10 pounds. My membership is paid off for the entire year, expiring in October, which I can then renew it for something like 30 dollars. I can't decide if I want to continue with JC. There is a part of me that wants to eat FRESH food. Produce that is still alive, and whole grains, and lean proteins, all while still enjoying my food. Aaron and I have been toying with the idea of eating mostly vegetarian. Meaning, we'd eat mostly veggies, grains, legumes, eggs and dairy during the day. And with our dinner we'd have a small portion of lean protein (chicken, fish, beef, pork, etc). And we definitely want to include fresh veggie juicing. I personally would like to eat at least half organic, but Aaron isn't too worried about that, and plus we don't really have easy access to organic produce.

I think my goals for this new year are fairly simple:

Body
- Eat Healthier! -Mostly vegetarian. I want to fuel my body, not toxify it.
- Eat Conciously! -Which will promote maximum enjoyment without overeating.
- Stay Hydrated! -Water is essential for all life functions.
- Consistently take Vitamins! -I need to make sure I'm giving my body vital nutrients.
- Move! -Both planned and unplanned exercise are important for a healthy body.
- Clear up! -I want to heal my acne.
Mind
- Self-Love! -Love and acceptance for all parts of self including my body.
- Self Pamering! -Bubblebaths with candles, manicures, pedicures, facials during solo chick-flick nights, and makeup shopping sprees are all fun ways of spoiling myself.
- Understanding! -I need to be patient with myself. Figuring out what I want to do with my life is going to take time. It will all fall into place.
- Sorting it out! -Get my living situation and work situation figured out.
Spirit
- Spiritual Growth! -Mediation for ego shrinkage and conciousness expansion.
- Read Osho! -Learning about my path will make the transition smoother.
- Be Open! -Aaron is trying to guide me with love.
- Be Persistent! -It won't be easy to let go of the ego at first.

So, all in all, I think that this is the perfect trinity for making my life what I want it. I have been so lucky to have loved and learned from Aaron this past year. He has made me see the beauty that has always been right before my eyes. His patience has made me strong and has kept our relationship from collapsing. He is immensely full of love and it radiates out of him; I soak it up. He makes me truly happy, I can be a kid with him. What more can I ask for?

“Dance as if no one were watching, Sing as if no one were listening, And live every day as if it were your last.”

Love, Laugh, Live.

Total Awesomeness!

2008-12-27T19:47:00.000-05:00

On Saturday my boyfriend, his family and myself spent the evening at Medieval Times in Lydhurst, New Jersey. We arrived at 2pm, entered around 2:30. There we drank Pina Coladas out of souvenir cups that flashed different colors. I wanted to drink some Mead, but I didn't want to find out the price. Aaron being the cutie he is, bought me two necklaces, and a light up silk rose which transitioned into a multitude of colors. When dinner time came we were seated in the Yellow Knight's section and the festivities began. Now, let me tell you, even though dear Aaron was seated right next to me, when I laid my eyes on our beloved Yellow Knight, it was love at first sight. I cheered as hard as I could for him. When he threw flowers into the audience I cheered louder and raised my hands, but alas, no rose for me. When he was defeated by the Blue Knight I felt my heart breaking. I enjoyed the hearty portions of tomato bisque soup, garlic bread, a half roast chicken, a spare rib, half of an herb roasted potato, and a delicious apple strudel. The entire show was wonderful, riveting, and engaging. On the drive home I found myself fantasizing of my Yellow Knight, and I suspect I'll see him in my dreams tonight.

If you've never been to Medieval Times, this should be on your bucket list. Its perfect for a birthday, anniversary, or just for a fun outing. The Museum of Torture was quite the attraction. Its just $2 for admission, but well worth the price. The variety of torture devices was astonishing, and the descriptions were quite graphic, which was utterly gut-wrenching. The most disturbing one was called "The Breast Ripper", in which they took this device and literally ripped the breasts off of women. Bleehhhh! But it definitely makes one appreciate the life we have here in this more civilized time. Anyway, it was a great time, and I recommend it to everyone!

TO THE YELLOW KNIGHT!!!

Just a picture of me with the glowing rose: